It had almost slipped my mind, but it was three years ago this month that I decided to be adventurous and buy my first ever dildo, back on the 4th May 2011, so I thought I’d share a photo I took later that year of my original sex toy collection. (click to enlarge)
It’s funny because I still remember this scene fondly and how I came to own the individual pieces, and I’ll briefly recap the history of each one below.
The first toy I bought was The Tool
, for the bargain price of £17, as a way to help me to try out anal penetration for the first time. When I carefully selected it from the vast array of available choices I intended that it would be the only toy I’d ever buy, and I’m happy to say that it did end up ticking every box. The design was discreet, it wasn’t too big for a first timer, nor too small that I’d outgrow it, the tapered tip helped with entry, the length allowed for thrusting, and it was made from a hygienic and durable material. I really did love that dildo, to the point that I became an overnight convert to anal play.
Only five days later I put in my second order, spurred on by a limited time 20% discount code that was printed on my receipt, and unfortunately this order proved less successful on the whole. I picked up the Double Bubble Gumdrops
butt plug, which turned out to be larger than advertised, and try as I might I just couldn’t get the second half into my body due to the steep taper. I also grabbed the Rocks Off Bad Boy
, convinced that prostate massage would be the next great step in my exploration of anal play, only to find that the supremely awkward shape was painful and would not fit inside my body in the intended position, and that the vibrations were poor and ineffective. Finally I chose the Rocks Off Blackberry
vibrating butt plug, and of the three this was the only one that I really liked, though if you asked me today I wouldn’t be in a hurry to recommend it.
Nine days after that I placed order three. I was quite determined to conquer the Double Bubble
plug and it became apparent that I would need something to help along the way, so I bought the rather cheap Classic Large
plug, and it the end it did its job.
Order four came the following month. I’d recently had the opportunity to try out a Fleshjack
and I was impressed enough with it that when I saw an Ice Jack
on sale for £35 I jumped at the chance. That was definitely my best purchase since The Tool
The other two toys in the picture came to me courtesy of the SexToys.co.uk
review programme, which I’d discovered and joined shortly after I began shopping with them. July saw the Tulip plug
coming my way, beginning a long term love affair with Tantus
, and September provided me with the Pierre Fitch Fleshjack dildo
. I adored that dildo, perhaps more than a man should feel for an inanimate piece of silicone. The first time I saw it on the website I was actually a little disappointed, because at the time Fleshjack made only three of these dildos, and Pierre Fitch happened to be the one I was least interested in, nevertheless when I received an e-mail saying that I’d been chosen to review it I couldn’t have been more excited. The RRP for it was £60, not something I would have willingly paid myself, yet I was getting the opportunity to try it anyway, which filled me with joy. When it arrived it was magnificent; it was my first ever realistic dildo, and because it was modelled on a real person the level of detail was incredible. It instantly became my favourite piece and the jewel in the crown of my collection, eventually inspiring me to collect several more
In a way it’s slightly strange for me to look back on that collection, because I remember how proud I was of it, whilst also feeling that it was slightly excessive to have eight toys. These days I have toys coming out of the woodwork, and it’s become a very normalised thing, so it’s fun to look back and recall the excitement I felt about it all in the early days. And with that we reach the end of my trip down memory lane.